Thursday, October 23, 2008

Sharing my heart...sort of

It has been a very difficult month around my house. Not quite sure what's in store for us down the road. I haven't posted too much "personal" stuff in awhile because it would have come across as very negative. That has been my attitude lately and as much as I try to get over it I am really having a hard time with it.

I can't go into too many details about what's going on - because it involves other people but I can say that for the first time ever in my life I have very angry with God. I've been so angry that I haven't even been able to sit and pray about things like I would have in the past. I shared this with a few very close friends a couple of weeks ago and let them know I needed intercessory prayers because I just wasn't capable of handling it on my own right now.

My husband is very good at his job. He has been with the company for 7 years. He works long, hard hours and his job is his priority in life. He has known about a re-structuring that is going to take place within the company for about 2 months. This will mean a lot of people are going to lose their jobs. Even though he has known about this for 2 months he couldn't tell anybody. It has torn him up because he really cares about his employees and he has hated lying to them. They can sense something is going on and he would be hit everyday with questions about what's happening and he would tell them not to worry about it, everything is okay...but he knew it wasn't okay.

I didn't agree with the way he was handling it but I am not in his shoes therefore I can't judge him. The announcement was going to be made last Tuesday about the restructuring. Friday before the Tuesday the President of the company flew into town to prepare for the announcement. Greg met with him and asked him if his job was secure. Greg was told yes, he had nothing to worry about, everything is okay. (Hmmm, okay isn't this the same message the Pres. has been telling Greg to tell "his" employees for 2 months and they ARE losing their jobs in Dec?)

Monday afternoon Greg was called into Human Resources and told by the President that his position is no longer needed and he would be let go in January. If he stayed until then he would be receiving a severance package. Thank you very much.

As you can imagine my husband's world was rocked...devastated...knocked out from under him. We didn't speak for three days last week. He was so distraught and angry with the world - he didn't want to take it out on me so he stayed away from me. Finally Thursday he broke down, apologized, cried and talked it out.

This Monday (as in 4 days ago) he was called by the Vice President of the company and told they made a premature decision and they are keeping his position and they need him. What the heck??!! Today the President and the VP flew in town to meet with him. Give me a break! I'm sorry, but ya just don't jerk people around like that....

Our lab puppy we got on Saturday is sick...very, very sick. She started getting sick Sunday evening. Tuesday morning I took her to the vet and found out she has hookworms. The vet gave her a couple of shots and gave me lots of medicine to give her but she only gave Raven a 50/50 chance of making it. I am taking her back in the morning...I'll be surprised if we don't have to put her to sleep. It's been an exhausting week taking care of my sick baby...bless her poor little heart, she is as sweet as can be. :-(


flemishe said...

I'm so sorry you are going through so much right now! I am thankful that your husband still has his job and am sad that your puppy is ill. I just lost my 16 yr old cat last month, and it's tough,. I hope your puppy pulls through. At least she is young, so she is probably tough! Give her every conceivable chance!

Hunny Bee said...

I'm so sorry you are dealing with this. We have been facing a somewhat similar issue in our house, which I haven't been able to share about much online due to the sensitive nature, but trust me, I know it's tough. We're one income and have a baby on the way, etc. Not knowing what's going on with a job is a nightmare. I'll be praying for you. Keep us posted, if possible. Take care and hang in there. You and your hubs aren't alone in this type of situation unfortunately. But thank God we have one more way (online) to reach out and encourage each other. You're in my prayers. - Hunnybee

Rebekah said...

I am so sorry you have to go through this. I know what its like to feel like your life is in flux. We went through a difficult time 1 1/2 years ago. I learned to really, really lean on God. Not just for a positve outcome of the situation, but to trust Him.

I will be praying for you guys

Monica said...

This is rough. Sometimes it seems that our future is in the hands of those who don't really know or care for us. But the truth is that we are held by Him who has bought us with a price- and He's not letting go!

I'll be praying for you and your husband. He sounds like a very worthy employee and a godly manager.